Identity Exploration

Identity exploration is normal and necessary, especially for young people. I work from a position of depth, to understand the whole person in front of me. Together we will answer the questions of “Who am I?” and “Who do I want to be?”

Areas of identity exploration that I work with include: education and career aspirations, spiritual development, personal expression, sexuality, and gender identity.

Gender Identity

I have a sub-specialization in gender identity exploration. This is sometimes referred to as gender dysphoria, or gender questioning, or gender distress. It often overlaps in other areas of identity exploration- in sexuality and personal expression.

In this work, I take a developmentally appropriate, exploratory, and least invasive approach. I deeply and holistically address all needs of my clients. With teens and children, I honor parental knowledge and wisdom. My approach slows down the process of gender identity exploration.

I treat gender identity questioning as a complex and gradual process that is shaped by co-occurring, or influencing, factors. I take care to assess, and work with, each client’s unique set of influencing factors. I aim to understand and support the whole complexity of my clients in discerning the roots of discomfort in and with the body.

  • Gender identity distress does not happen in a vacuum. It is important to consider both our culture and the whole person.

    Examples of what I consider includes:

    —Diagnoses and their impact. There is an over-representation of young people, reporting gender identity distress, who are also presenting with Autism, ADHD, Anxiety, Depression, and OCD.

    —The onset of distress often occurs through difficult events in the process of growing up- such as social isolation from peers, the onset of puberty, and adjusting to a changing body.

    —Some young people are primarily exploring their personal expression or their sexuality, and need some help in untangling the the difference between gender identity, gender expression and/or sexuality.

    —Our culture is starting to ask young people to consider their gender identity and expression. Children can experience discomfort and confusion if they are presented with this material before they are developmentally ready.

    —Trauma. There is an over-representation of young people, reporting gender identity distress, who have also experienced difficult events early in life, such as abuse and involvement in the foster care system.

  • I will help you to navigate your child’s gender exploration with discernment, compassion, and wisdom.

    Examples of what I help parents with include:

    —Understanding the intersectional impact of the culture that we live in, your child’s development, and any specific influencing factors that they are living with.

    —Honoring your child’s developmental needs for exploration, expression, and identity, while prioritizing their holistic well-being and physical safety.

    —Helping you to set boundaries with your child, while also providing opportunities for autonomy and experimentation.

    —Listening to your intuition and knowing of your child. This leads to increased discernment in navigating current cultural norms around gender expression and identity, and in navigating your child’s requests for a new name, pronouns, medical interventions, etc.

Navigating Emotions

It takes time and practice at living to understand our emotions. Sadness, loneliness, depression, fear, frustration, and anxiety are common emotions that I work with. Together we will work to understand what different emotions feel like in your body, how to navigate them, and new ways of expressing them in the world.

  • Emotions are a normal part of life. It takes time and practice to learn how to feel into them— to become aware of what different emotional states feel like in your individual body, what they mean for you, and how to work with them and express them in a healthy way. We are not born with the intrinsic ability to regulate our emotions, it is something we need to learn and practice, and it is possible to learn at every stage of life.

    Life and relationship changes are constant, and sometimes they initiate a new, or familiar, emotional response— eliciting sadness, frustration, anxiety, or depression.

    If you are feeling an increase in an emotion, you are being given valuable information about yourself and how to navigate your life. However, the information will not fully reveal itself to you until you engage with, and explore, the emotion.

    I act as a guide in this exploration process, providing a safe space to feel into your feelings, express them, and to learn more about yourself and new ways of being in the world. I will honor your knowing of yourself while helping you to develop mindful awareness of your emotions, cultivate your self-compassion, adapt to life’s situations, and find new ways to re-frame and navigate your life.

  • We aren’t born knowing how to regulate our emotions. Children aren’t inherently good at communicating their feelings, and what might work to calm one child won’t necessarily work for another. As children grow into teens, they start to develop a greater capacity to both feel their feelings and to express them, but sometimes need help to not get stuck in one emotional state.

    Just like adults, children and teens of every age experience feelings of sadness, fear, loneliness, anxiety, and frustration. 

    Perhaps, as a parent, the root cause of their suffering is clear: a life transition, a loss, or a disruption in routine. Sometimes you might be unsure of the cause, and wonder what falls outside the limits of typical child behavior. 

    When your child or teen has trouble controlling their emotions, it can lead to frequent outbursts, tantrums and behavioral challenges. Or, they might internalize their feelings of sadness and anxiety, through increased isolation and feelings of loneliness.

    Children with challenges in regulating their emotions have the opportunity to lead a healthier and stable life when they receive proper support. 

    I can help you in understanding why your child or teen is struggling with emotional regulation, and offer different interventions to help your child learn to be with the waves of their feelings. I will provide them with a safe and exploratory space to feel their feelings, express them, and learn new ways of engaging in the world.

Neurological Differences

Possessing a neurological difference might mean that you or your child needs support in learning different ways to navigate the world. I offer neurodiversity-informed therapy and interventions that supports a person’s growing, learning and development while respecting their unique gifts, individuality and knowing of self.

I’m well versed working with people living with:

Autism, Sensory Integration Disorder, Gifted Learners, Specific Learning Disabilities, Developmental Disabilities, Oppositional Defiant Disorder, ADHD and ADD, Anxiety, and Depression.

  • Description text goes here

  • With school-age children and teens I offer interventions to support both in the home and school environment. During therapy sessions I provide support that is at their developmental level and takes into account their unique neurological profile.

    With parents I provide coaching to help you to better understand your unique child and how to engage them in supportive ways. I can help you to create a home environment and routine that will work best for your child, and I can help you to navigate school supports and services.